Its the last day of my study break weekend. Woo-hoo. I'm supposed to have come out of this feeling more prepared for my CAs which start tomorrow, but somehow, I seem to have come out of this four days feeling more disillusioned and confused instead. Nothing seems to make sense anymore. I don't really know what I doing and why I'm doing this. Doesn't seem worthed it at all.
But then you watch medical dramas like Grey's and ER and then you get it. You get what you are doing, you get why you are doing it, you get it all. Its so simple. You are doing all this so that one day, you can do what the characters do on medical dramas; have a hell of an exciting, dirty, busy day, saving and making a difference to the lives of others. So maybe thats why I insist on watching so many medical dramas these days - to constantly remind myself why I'm doing this. To remind myself that that kind of life, is what I'm working so hard to achieve and obtain. And that one day, no matter how tough or long the road may be, I'll still cross the finishing line.
I wish I could be less neurotic about so many different things in life. I wish I could be one of those people, who could easily separate fun and work. I wish I could be one of those people, who could be happy even when they are feeling sad, who could be calm even when they are feeling anxious, who can take every single punch thrown at them without flinching. I wish I were a lot of things, but this world ain't perfect, and wishing is just about the only way I can ever come close to being things that I ain't meant to be.
So let's get it rollin'. Its the last stretch people! Good luck and seeya all tomorrow! _________________________________________________________________
Ah shit, I'm such a blog-whore. A rather depressing song from Snow Patrol called 'Make This Go On Forever' once again featured in Grey's Anatomy. I get so much of my music inspiration from Grey's that I don't know what would happen if I stop watching it. Absolutely no more source of emo/indie songs. Anyway, this was featured in season 3, episode 15 - Walk On Water. The ending is tragic, perfect for such a dark and depressing song.
"And I don't know where to look My words just break and melt Please just save me from this darkness Please just save me from this darkness"
Name: voldemort33
XY, 01/06/1987, s'porean typical geminian free-thinker moody & eccentric thinks far too much for his own good med student (be afraid. be very afraid!) demon45_6f@hotmail.com
crazy craves
music (jazz, rock and lounge) day-dreaming drawing & photography animals (sheep!) chocolate and tea! seafood, noodles and soup!
pet peeves
noisy crowds over-possessive, insecure, whiny people two-faced hypocrites housework and homework being called 'rich' rushing to do stuff crying, pesky kids
deepest darkest desires! (aka wishlist!)
to be a doctor (with a heart of gold!) a dog my own condo apartment a driving license and my own four wheel drive my own comic line someone to hug
