let's see how far we've come
Friday, 12 September 2008
pathological state of mind
Tomorrow's Pathology CA is going to make a pathological mess out of me!

Damian is awfully bored and sick of looking at anymore pathological slides/pots. But Damian can't stop because he is scared that he'll die for it, when 249 of his cohort mates are taking this latest CA so seriously. Damian sincerely wishes that he could just flunk it, because its taking too much effort to do the opposite. However, Damian's pride is a nasty thing that refuses to let him throw the towel into the recycling bin... because Damian has (so far) never failed a test in Med School and he intends maintain that record til he dies graduates from friggin' Med School.

Pride is a stupid thing, and Damian hates it. Damian belongs to a faculty where no one wants to lose, and no one can lose, so Damian is angry, frustrated, disgusted, irritated, chronically pissed off with himself for being in an industry that demands the best of you every single day. Damian really wants to just watch Sodagreen everyday.

Unfortunately, Damian actually loves pathology. All the blood and gore speaks to him like art to Picasso and music to Beethoven. Blood and gore is fun, blood and gore is cool, blood and gore makes the world go deliriously wild and round round round!
Wetter, bloodier, messier! Love the world!

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posted by voldemort33 @ 20:58   0 comments
Monday, 30 June 2008
silver haired beauties

Okay, I decided to post this picture because of the little nice old lady who took me for pathology tutorial today. She totally reminded me of the other little nice old lady in the picture, whom I met in Europe. She was our tour guide around the Roman Ruins in Rome and I totally went gaga over her (the rest can testify to that!) Our tutor today, whom I think is Prof. Ivy Seah, was just like her, so nice and knowledgeable. Joanne and I were totally blown away by her amazing grandmotherly-ness!

I've got to admit that I've this rather strange liking of grandmothers. I wouldn't call it a fetish (eek!) but I think its a sort of gravitation towards having a matriarchal figure in life. I love my own grandmothers, and one of my many regrets in life is that I wasn't closer to my paternal grandmother before she passed away almost 9 years ago. But right now, I'm glad that I'm quite close to my maternal grandmother and that she's relatively healthy and happy. Granted that she has diabetes which is a chronic condition that's notoriously hard to control, but hey, at least she's relatively ambulatory.

I think grandmother figures are just amazing. There's something startling beautiful about them, the way they carry the weight of their experiences on their shoulders, their greyish-white hair being sort of a badge of honour, the way their smiles always reveal wisdom, benevolence and maternal warmth. I find it absurd that my female peers are so adverse to aging these days: I mean, growing old doesn't necessarily mean that you lose your beauty and the best years of your prime, in fact, growing old can be a beautiful thing, and when you find the right balance to age gracefully, you'll become someone so beautiful that even those anorexic super models can't even compare with.

I hope I meet Prof. Ivy Seah again. Sigh. Grannies all around the world rock!

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posted by voldemort33 @ 22:04   0 comments
Friday, 11 April 2008
never over-eat again!
I've learnt a very important lesson today, and that is that my stomach can NO longer stomach as much food as I was able to when I was a Secondary school/JC student. Never again will I force myself to eat so much stuff during buffets. I am still feeling extremely sick over the Dim Sum buffet I had for lunch today, so much so that I haven't had the guts to eat anything since then. Seriously. I shall swear of binging man. Its not worthed it!

I feel as if the food's still stuck in my oesophagus and that its unwilling to go down into my stomach. God I feel like a bomb just ready to blow.

Honestly, I rather have diarrhea.

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posted by voldemort33 @ 23:02   0 comments
Friday, 14 March 2008
my life is a tragi-comedy
Life throws you the punches, and it takes alot of guts to dare to roll with it. But every now and then, life throws you a super duper massive punch that makes you go *blink-blink*. Then you look at the fast approaching fist and you consider dodging it this way and that, but then, suddenly, something in your cerebrum goes *click* and you tell yourself, 'What's the point?' and then you don't even bother moving away as the fist comes crashing into you once pretty face.

My life is a tragi-comedy. Its very very funny and hilarious, because I am quite a funny, clumsy, crazy person, and I'm surrounded by funny funny friends. But at the same time, it is a tragedy, because tragic, most tragic, so tragic that they're tragically funny things start befalling onto me. I can almost smell the bittersweet scent of Irony as it comes streaking in front of me, shaking its stinky butt in my face and sticking out its slimy tongue, in total mockery of my totally sad state. I honestly can't decide whether I should laugh or yell in despair. I think I'll make do with something in between, like laughing while yelling or something.

To all my friends who messaged or called me and offered their condolences, a big thank you for your care and concern. I really appreciated it. It made the hilarity of the whole situation even clearer, and yes, made it clear that if someone deserves the award for ultimately suay-ness, either one of us Mr Yeos will get it (though I still think the other Mr Yeo deserves it more! =p)

Whatever comes next in my tragi-comedy of a life, it'll probably be either more tragic or even more hilarious. So to all who have so far enjoyed following 'The Damian Yeo Show', stay tuned for more exciting, heart-wrenching and hilarious things to come!

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posted by voldemort33 @ 19:47   0 comments
Friday, 28 December 2007
i loathe red light cameras
Today was a day where everything on the road went wrong! The number of times I felt like killing myself by driving directly into traffic, gosh, it was horrible. I am still very frustrated at my stupidity and impulsiveness.

Anyway, what happened was that I was on my way to Holland Village from school to meet up with Alex and Geraldine when I went past this traffic junction at Buona Vista, it was already Amber when I approached it so I decided to accelerate and beat the light, but unfortunately the light turned red when half my car crossed the junction. It was then that I chose to look up and saw, to my horror, a sign that said 'RED LIGHT CAMERA'.
At that very moment, it felt as if someone had just told me that I was infected with melioidosis causing Burkholderia Pseudomallei. Its not the worst thing that can happen to you, but its certainly an awful feeling. So I was so furious with myself that I just had to go back to the scene of the crime to see if I had really beat the red light camera, because I did not notice a single camera or any flash then. So I did a U turn, drove all the way back to NUS, U-turned onto AYE and did the same route over again.
What I noticed was that the junction that had the sign was actually BEFORE the cameras (which were located at the next junction!) - which meant that the sign serves as a warning for people wanting to beat the red light for the next junction. This meant that I did not do anything wrong and that I did not get caught by the camera and did not just incur a $300 fine and 6 demerit points. (I think and hope that I am RIGHT.)

Feeling slightly better that I may have been saved by a miracle (and solemnly swearing that I will never try to beat a red light again!) I went ahead to Holland Village. Unfortunately, parking there was horrendous - it was impossible to find any parking there at around 7.
So I drove out of the public carpark and decided to go park at the carpark of Holland Village shopping centre. Unfortunately, the carpark was full and there was a queue for it, so I joined the queue, only that my car was in the yellow box of a traffic junction.
After a long wait, I realised that I was never going to get a lot there any time soon, plus I was already running late for the stipulated meeting time, so I decided to go and park at the multi-story carpark opposite Holland Village.
I decided to wait for the light to turn red because I needed to filter out of the yellow box, and considering the amount of traffic then, it was probably only safe to do it when the light was red.
So I did that, filtered out when the light was red, and because I most certainly could not stay in the yellow box of a junction, I went straight, effectively beating a red light. It was at this moment, that I noticed for a second gut wrenching, heart breaking time, that there were CAMERAS at the junction as well.

However, I did not notice any flash or any indication that the cameras were functional. Nonetheless, for the second time in a short duration of twenty minutes, I felt like I wanted to kill myself all over again.
The idea that I might have to pay a total of $600 dollars in fines and have my license REVOKEDs after just a month of earning it, felt like someone telling me that I've most likely been infected with HIV (after some needle stick injury!). Right now, I feel like I'm just waiting for the results of the Western Blot HIV confirmation test, and its a horrible torture to be stuck in this state of limbo. Boo-hoo.

It was a miracle that I was able to find the heart to meet the two of them after that. But I'm glad I did. We went to have dinner at NYDC and then desserts at the 2AM dessert bar located at some ulu corner of Holland Village - its a place that many of our other classmates have been to before, and since Geraldine surprised us all with a request to go out to have some desserts and wine, we decided to visit that place and try out the cuisine there.
Of course, only Geraldine ordered dessert wine (I am a DRIVER and Alex claims he is allergic to alcohol!) but the three of us ordered desserts as well. Alex's Tiramisu was fantastic, Ger's Mudslide was weird, and my Blackberry was... abstract. Still, the desserts there were good, and if you don't mind the rather hefty price, the place is still a good place to go relax and chill with a couple of friends or so.

Very soon, we started spewing nonsense again. Talked about lots of stuff, the usual nonsensical crap, my usual nonsense (Is He? Is She? ISABELLA!), Alex's usual cryptic-ness, Ger's usual rubbish and also serious stuff, like the state of our relationships, marriage, children, etc etc.
It was enjoyable, lots of laughs, because I insisted that Ger's becoming an alcoholic and was drunk, she kept insisting that she was not, but got very high; Alex acting as if he was able to judge the level of drunkness that she is in, and she insisting that Alex and I were more drunk that she was because we were both so nonsensical.
I've got to admit, I was high, but not on alcohol, but rather due to the pine leaves that I was smelling, because my dish had a couple of pine leaves given to us and you were supposed to smell it to give you a different taste or something. ANYWAY, it was abstract, and although I didn't really get it, I HAD to act as though I understood it.

After that, I offered to send both of them home. What's up with me and sending people home? I remember the first lesson that Kailiang taught me after I got my license was always to learn to say NO. So far, I've never said 'no' to anyone, but then neither does Kailiang. But oh what the heck, I might have my license revoked so really, I shouldn't care about that right now. Grrrrrr.

P.S: I just read Geraldine's blog and she calls me and Alex her GIRLFRIENDS, to quote her exact words, 'they're like this bunch of great girlfriends that most girls have, that I don't.' Although I most certainly RESENT that label, it is no doubt true. I would much prefer the term 'listening ear' though. But anyway, that's what die-hard friends are for. I know they would do the same thing for me, so really, its the least we could do for her.

I should stop now.

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posted by voldemort33 @ 23:59   0 comments
Monday, 19 November 2007
i'm a leopard
Old habits die hard. A leopard never changes its spots.
I was a gossip mongrel in JC, I was in charge of keeping a gossip manual to keep up with the latest gossips in class, and guess what? I was in charge of spreading them as well! I was the class' very own PA system. Why though? Because I firmly believed that the public has the right to know! =)

When I entered University, I thought that I would finally be able to be less of a PA system and gossip. Unfortunately, it appears that I am, a chronic gossip. Major secrets I can keep, but affairs of the heart and scandals, HOHO, I definitely can't keep! Why am I such a trickster you ask? Because I firmly believe that the public has the right to know! =)

I probably have a cosy room reserved in Hell, all nicely decorated just for me when I go there after death. Not that I believe in a Heaven and Hell, but yeah, you get my point. Oh but the happiness and excitement and laughter that gossip brings! Such wonderful joy and delight! I admit the chaos it brings is so darn addictive. Nothing makes my heart happier that seeing the wondrous look of bewilderment that amazing gossip brings! Because you see, I firmly believe that the public has the right to know! And be happy of course! =)

I am in a happy mood right now. I feel like Willy Wonka or Captain Jack Sparrow, so delightfully gay and kooky. Oh random note, both characters were played by the amazing Johnny Depp, who is my favourite actor and incidentally, a Gemini. What can I say? We Geminis rock!

I am a Leopard. Because I firmly believe that the public has the right to know. =)

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posted by voldemort33 @ 13:47   0 comments
Sunday, 28 October 2007
focus on being up there
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Such Great Heights - The Postal Service
I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles
In our eyes are mirror images and when
We kiss they're perfectly aligned
And I have to speculate that God himself
Did make us into corresponding shapes like
Puzzle pieces from the clay
And true, it may seem like a stretch, but
Its thoughts like this that catch my troubled
Head when you're away when I am missing you to death
When you are out there on the road for
Several weeks of shows and when you scan
The radio, I hope this song will guide you home

They will see us waving from such great
Heights, 'come down now,' they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away,
'come down now,' but we'll stay...

I tried my best to leave this all on your
Machine but the persistent beat it sounded
Thin upon listening
And that frankly will not fly. You will hear
The shrillest highs and lowest lows with
The windows down when this is guiding you home


Nice song. I love the way it makes me semi-happy.
_____________________________________________________

This is going to sound really really random, but I've got to get this off my chest.

I was on my way home from town yesterday, and while I was sitting at the bus stop, Immunology notes in hand, I caught sight of multiple couples, intensely in love, walking around. And then its struck - this amazing sense of emptiness. And all of a sudden, I felt like dating again.

I think its a result of watching too much Grey's Anatomy, and being too emotionally involved with the TV series. And imagining myself being McDreamy and being Meredith's love of her life. Its getting into my head, and because Derek announced in the latest episode, that he needed to start dating, subconsciously, I felt that I needed to start dating as well.
But see, that's the key - I may feel all emotionally drained and vulnerable, but I don't think I can find the strength or impetus to even date right now. Not when memories of the previous fiasco of a relationship are still fresh in my mind. Look where dating got me the previous time? In a horrible horrible mess.

Then there's the whole idea of who to date and stuff. Not that I don't have an idea of who I would want to date... its just that, I don't know if relationships are even my cup of tea.
I mean - its me. I'm the great proponent of non-marriage, of being single for the rest of your life, of being a swinging single. I never thought I would end up in a state where I would be so sappy and love struck and even desperate.
This is so unlike me - if you had told me back in Secondary School or JC that I would one day, be babbling like this today, I wouldn't have believed you. This is not good for me really.
Seriously. My mind is playing games with me because I've been forcing it to take in boring, intense information on COFM, Immunology and Microbiology, and its not going to let me off the hook anytime soon.

Then there's the horrible phase of chasing the girl again. Gosh. The amount of time, effort and money spent the last time made me feel like an idiot. Sure it got me alot closer, but if that experience helped, girls can pick you up one moment and hurl you down in the next instance. Why are they so horrible?

Okay, maybe the problem's with me, that I'm daydreaming too much. I don't NEED to be dating. I just need time to stop thinking about people being giddly in love and hating their guts for being in love. I need time to stop thinking that love exists, but that its just not with me right now. More importantly, I need to stop feeling this amazing upsurge of jealousy when she talks and laughs with another guy.
I need to focus on friendship first, and NOT on possibilities. I NEED TO FOCUS. I need for one freaking point in my life, to not be as neurotic as Derek, or as klutzy as Meredith. I need to be freaking Bailey, focused, determined, and in her Nazi best.
I mean, I have upcoming exams. I have driving. I have problems - people to people problems, being part of the family problems, being a worthy enemy problems, being a good friend problems.
And again, I have exams. I have studying to do. I have to focus on my priorities and not fantasize on possible what ifs and fairy tale scenarios where I'm her knight in shining whatever who saves her from drowning during a boating incident.
Focus. That's what I need.

*Takes a deep steadying breath*
I am so so so screwed.

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posted by voldemort33 @ 10:25   0 comments
Sunday, 30 September 2007
the thing called Facebook
I think its high time I talked about the web phenomenon called Facebook.

NOOoooooooOOOoooo! I have not joined the online social networking program and I must say I must be one of the few people that I know who have yet to join this... thing that's been controlling the lives of SO MANY people. That said, DO NOT try to convert me into joining Facebook! I will not waver in my determination to not get ensnared by this insidious, brain washing virus that has plagued the world! I WILL NOT SURRENDER MY INDIVIDUALITY, FREEDOM AND SANITY TO IT! DUMBLEDORE RULES!

I wanted to blog about Facebook (and its corrupting influence on society) on Monday, when my study session at Gladys' place fell to pieces because we were partly too lazy to do any mugging, and also because the girls were trying to lure me into joining Facebook by showing me all the 'wonderfully fun' things that you could do on it.
From throwing chickens and sheep at people (why, on earth would you want to do that in the first place? Why?!?!), to casting spells like Aguamenti and watching your friends respond in similar fashion; from joining groups with weird names and even weirder contents, to meeting people over the pages of history (and from all walks of life!)
It is obvious that I wasn't impressed with their little sales pitch, although I must admit, the Harry Potter Application does have some amount of pulling power, only because I am really interested to see which House the 'Sorting Hat' would place me in. (If the Harry Potter application allowed me to cast 'Avada Kedavra' at people - and therefore effectively ban them from using Facebook ever again - I would join the group immediately, NO QUESTIONS ASKED.)
I must say Facebook burns the time of University students, causing them to leave their books untouched and unread. It is EVIL and therefore, must be eradicated!

Worrying though it may be, I had only expected University Students to be enraptured by this insidious threat to humanity. To my utter amazement, I have discovered that NSFs are also victims of this horrible mind-controlling disease as well!
Today, while eating dinner with 4 of my army friends, I have come across worrying evidence, that my army friends are also being BRAIN-WASHED and CONTROLLED by FACEBOOK AS WELL! THE HORROR!
Threats of "leaving messages on each others' walls", of "superpoking each other" and of "throwing sheep" at each other peppered their otherwise sane conversations. I immediately expressed my concern for this worrying fixation with a computer program that seems to have no real purpose at all - apart from throwing animals at your friends and laughing your hearts out after doing it.
It is an ADDICTION that must be stopped, or else, the nation will be reduced to a population of mindless zombies who look forward to nothing in life but superpoking each other to oblivion!
Productivity will fall! Economic growth will crumble! Our defences laid bare! Our roads and highways will be devoid of cars! Our society bland and activity-less! Our city empty and abandoned! SINGAPORE WILL BE DOOMED!

I urge all my fellow friends who have yet to fall victim to this ever present, and ever growing threat - STAND YOUR GROUND and do not falter! DO NOT GIVE IN TO THE MADNESS THAT IS FACEBOOK! IT IS NOTHING MORE THAN A DARK PLOT TO TAKE OVER THE MINDS OF OUR BRIGHTEST AND FINEST PEOPLE! FIGHT BRAVELY YOUNG WARRIORS AND ONE DAY, WE WILL LIBERATE OUR FELLOWS FROM THE VIRUS' HOLD! FOR DUMBLEDORE AND VOLDEMORT! WE RULE!

And now, to kill some Protoss and feast on Terran blood. Excuse me while I waste my brain away on Starcraft. Hehe.

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posted by voldemort33 @ 22:06   0 comments
Sunday, 16 September 2007
in deep shit
Alright, this is going to be an entry where I start whining and whining about not being able to keep up with school work, so readers beware! I will not be responsible for any panic (or non-panic) it induces.

ANYWAY, I think I'm really in deep shit with regards to keeping up with readings! Dear me! I woke up at 11 o'clock, which is considered later than normal. I usually wake up at 9 o'clock and that timing is perfect because it gives me ample time in the morning to slack and accumulate enough guilt over not doing anything constructive, which would then galvanize me to actually start on some work.
BUT I WOKE UP AT 11 TODAY! WHICH resulted in my whole cycle being totally screwed up! I blame it on not being able to sleep in yesterday, because I decided to be a filial son and accompany my mom to the market. Sigh. So I slept in today to account for the sleep debt incurred yesterday. At look where it has gotten me to? Total disruption of my normal schedule. =/

I ended up eating brunch - two slices of bread with bacon, and leftovers from the dinner that my mom cooked for the whole extended family last night. (One of the dishes happen to be fried pig's heart! YUM YUM!)
And before I could convince myself to go up and do some work, I ended up watching some documentary on Channel U, about the rise of great nations. So from 12 to 1, I was watching some show about the rise of the Dutch, how they created the first banking system, stock market, yada yada yada.

After that, it was 2 hours of blog & internet surfing. And then a game of Starcraft which ended up becoming a 2 and a half hour titanic battle because my Protoss opponent was quite good. I had to use all my Zerg ingenuity to beat his sorry ass man. But at the cost of my whole AFTERNOON being burnt away.
And now I just found out that we have to go to the architect's house tonight - apparently he has finished the designs for our house and wants to have the final approval tonight so that we can at least start work on it... I feel kinda guilty about the house actually, I must admit I have been too cooped up with my own world and work to actually take notice of what my parents have been doing. And so much for promising to take a more active role in its planning and conception!

So I have no time to do any reading today! Which brings the weekend to a close... plus the fact that I have done absolutely zero reading this weekend! Yesterday was just spending time playing Starcraft and going to MAF, today's also spent on playing Starcraft and doing other crap matters.
I hardly have time to do work on week days, with tuition and all, and if I don't do some work on weekends, where am I going to find the time to do it then? BLOODY HELL.
I need to catch up with work during the recess week... but I've got a nasty feeling people would be eager to organise outings then!
And though I seriously want to catch up with work and do my readings, I DO NOT WANT TO DEVOLVE into a MUGGER who spends every single waking (and sleeping) moment of his life thinking about school work! HOW HOW HOW! SUCH CONFLICTING VALUES! I am in such deep shit!

The sheer amount of work to read up for COFM, pathology and immunology is seriously freaking me out. I ABSOLUTELY DETEST COFM. MY GOD. THANKS FOR MAKING MY LIFE MISERABLE, with you theoretical nonsense and statistical what-nots! DIE COFM LECTURERS! I hope rotten eggs fall down from the sky and smash onto your heads and give you a foul stench for the rest of your sorry lives! OR EVEN BETTER, DEMENTORS COME AND KISS YOU AND SUCK YOUR NO GOOD SOULS LIKE JELLY OUT OF A STRAW! BLEAHHHHHHHHH!

I WILL CATCH UP DURING RECESS WEEK! ACK*!

Okay. I need to calm down. Calm down, calm down, calm down.
*Damian is in his happy place, doing happy things, thinking about happy thoughts! Weeeeeee~!*

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posted by voldemort33 @ 17:50   0 comments
Monday, 6 August 2007
lets take it to a higher level
One question I like to ask myself: If I were a wizard in the world of Harry Potter, what kind of wizard would I be?

So to take the obsession to a higher level, I've created a bio-data sheet about me, Harry Potter Lexicon style.

Basic Information
Name: Damian "Danny" Darmacus Yeo - because I've always wanted to be called 'Danny' and I thought Darmacus sounds weird and creepy enough to be wizardry.
Alias: Baron Bigsheepy, Da Mian Yang
Birthdate: 1st June 1987

Family
Ancestry: Half-Blood - since my mom claims that she's descended from Molly Weasley and my Dad's about as Magical as a toaster.
Siblings: 1 elder brother - who's either a Squib or Muggle because he doesn't believe in Magic.
Location of childhood home: The village of Green Meadows - which is so so appropriate for someone who's alias is that of a sheep.
Pet: Oscar the Raven - because I love the name 'Oscar' and I love Ravens as well.

Hogwarts
Attended: 2000 - 2006
House: Ravenclaw - Oh yeah! For more information about this, read entry dated 28/07/07!
Earned 9 OWLS (9 Attempted): Charms (E), Transfiguration (A), Potions (O), History of Magic (O), Arithmancy (O), Divination (O), Ancient Runes (O), Herbology (O), DADA (O), Care of Magical Creatures (O) - Based on my O'levels. Try and guess which subjects are which!
Earned 6 NEwTS (6 Attempted): Charms (O), Potions (O), Care of Magical Creatures (E), Arithmancy (O), DADA (O), Ancient Runes (O) - Based on my A levels!
Awards: Special Award for Services to the School (5th Year), published papers in Challenges in Charming and Defence Against the Dark Force League Journal


Skills, Magical Devices, Etc
Wand: Hazel wood, Phoenix feather core, 10 3/4 inches - because Hazel's associated with my star sign Gemini and I personally love Hazel Nut Cappuccino Frappe from TCC. Plus, my favourite wand core from Ollivanders is still Phoenix feather, so yeah.
Other Devices: Pensieve - because it reminds me of a wizarding laptop
Organisations & Affiliations: Order of the Phoenix, St Mungo's Hospital For Magical Maladies and Injuries - in the end, I ultimately think I'll be in the Order instead of Voldie's gang of Death Eaters. I could be like their medic or something.
Career: Trainee Healer at St Mungo's - I really am still in training.
Languages: Mermish and a smattering of Gobbledegook, French and Japanese - in the real world, it'll be Mandarin and Theochew dialect.
Skills: Charms, some level of Legilimency, not very good at Occlumency though, Prescient Dreams, experimental Alchemy/Charms

Patronus: Sliver ram/sheep - very fat and fluffy, doesn't like to charge, has a tendency to trot and 'Bah' at Dementors.
Boggart: My own corpse being mutilated by blood sucking leeches - I fear both death and blood sucking leeches. Argh.
Amortentia (love potion) smells: freshly mowed grass, refreshing smell of rain, light flowery smell of someone's hair.
Worst fear/memory: Being publicly humiliated for being a wizard when he was 10 - Last time I cried in public.
Mirror of Erised: Being the most celebrated Healer of the time, discovering cures for new diseases

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posted by voldemort33 @ 19:58   1 comments
Saturday, 4 August 2007
ROFL!


A BIG SHOUT OUT to Geraldine for recommending me this youtube video! ITS ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS! If you find Communist propaganda videos amusing (like I do!) watch it for have some pretty good laughs!
In fact, everyone should watch it! And if you do watch it, YOU HAVE TO WATCH the whole thing! I promise you that you won't regret it! (it doesn't last very long, just roughly 5 mins or so!)

Its a recorded performance of the "Yellow River" Piano Concerto done in the 1970s, and the way the film is cut and filmed, is classic Communist propaganda, which makes it so funny, I was left in stitches after watching it!

Favourite moments:
1. The way the hair of the pianist bounces along with his body movements - I think it almost manages to steal the show away from the pianist's amazing bouncing hands!
2. The whole orchestra's body language - if I didn't know better, I would have thought that this was a piece performed by some cyborg orchestra or something! FREAKY the way they move in unison!
3. The sudden close up on the Pipa-ist for his solo! He was playing with so much passion and enthusiasm you could really almost feel his heart bursting in praise of his Motherland's greatness! (I also love the fact that he is literally pouring his heart and soul into his solo, which only lasts like what? One line?!)

4. The conductor - first of all, he looks like a male version of Miss Piggy from the Muppets. Secondly, his movements are hilarious, the way he swings his arms with so much gusto, the way he sticks out his massive spare tire, the way he looks imperiously around like his some Emperor or something. But best of all is his expression near the end, his look of sheer reverence for the something hanging upon the wall, which incidentally turns out to be item no.5 on this list!
5. The close up of the portrait of Mao Zedong hanging upon the wall! OH MY FREAKING GOD! THIS IS THE SINGLE MOST HILARIOUS PART OF THE VIDEO! I love the way the conductor first puts on this look of reverence before the video suddenly zooms in on the portrait! And kudos to Geraldine for spotting that cause I didn't catch that in my first view!

6. The way they zoomed out to capture the whole orchestra performing the climax of the concerto, with Mao's portrait hanging high above them, overlooking his beloved subjects, who are so obviously filled with love, passion and respect for the Motherland, so much so that they are willing to channel all their heart-felt emotions into every single fibre of muscle to perform such beautiful music! ALL IN PRAISE OF MAO'S EXTRAORINARY VISION and CHINA'S AMAZING MIGHT! LONG LIVE THE PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF CHINA! WOO HOO!

I sincerely hope the Chinese authorities do not stumble upon this entry.
But I've got to admit though - the music is AMAZINGLY GOOD. Just that well, the hilarity of the communist undertones sorta makes it hard to focus on the music. *Chuckles*

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posted by voldemort33 @ 00:25   0 comments
Sunday, 15 July 2007
show us the signs
You know you are going mad, when you wake up in the middle of the night, horrified that you are having a dream (or rather, nightmare) where you are in the midst of a wedding - YOUR OWN wedding.

You know you are REALLY going mad, when you have the same bloody nightmare three times in a row, over the course of three nights. Somebody save me!

Unfortunately, the wedding looks to be awfully lavish and expensive. But thankfully, my bride doesn't look like an Ang Ku Kueh or something. From what I can roughly remember, she's slim, shorter than me, looks like an Asian version of tennis female world no.1 Justine Henin, complete with sharp nose and narrow, twinkling eyes. Oh and she loves to have her hair tied up in a ponytail (which I kind of dig really). I hope she's intelligent and caring and sweet though. And I really hope she exists.

Still, for someone who has sworn all his JC life to NEVER get married, this series of recurrent dreams is really, quite alarming. Let's hope he makes it through tonight.

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posted by voldemort33 @ 00:04   0 comments
Friday, 6 July 2007
my own transformer
Okay, because I'm Transformer crazy here, I thought that it'll be cool to create my very own Transformer Guardian, sorta like my own Bumblebee or something, so I decided to create my own fictional Transformer based on certain aspects of my personality and likes and stuff.

So ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to my friend, Nightstalker!



As you can see, I only have his vehicular form set out. I need to actually draw out his robot form before I can actually place it on here, but don't you think that that'll be an interesting holiday project? We'll see if I actually have the mood and time to do that.

Some statistics about Nightstalker:
Alternate mode: Black Jaguar XKR sports convertible (incidentally, this is my dream car!)
Fraction: Ambivalent, mostly with Autobots - formerly with the Decepticons but betrayed them for the Autobot cause, but has been known to occasionally leak Autobot secrets to Decepticons. Occasionally works as a double agent.
Rank: 8, serves mainly as special ops agent, saboteur, spy, interceptor, strategist
Weapons: A pair of twin sabres, a pair of plasma blasters, single slow load Energon cannon, shoulder missle launchers
Motto: "Seriously?", "This is stupid.", "Why are we doing this? Are we seriously gonna do this?"

Strength: 6/10 (can only take on smaller robots head on)
Speed: 9/10
Firepower: 7/10 (prefers not to use firearms in battle)
Skill: 8/10 (mainly in hit and run tactics and wielding of his twin sabres)
Intelligence: 9/10

Personality:
Nightstalker is a robot with anti-establishment tendencies, a cynical outlook of life and a tendency to be moody and eccentric. Having betrayed his former fraction, the Decepticons, Nightstalker is part of the Autobot team, though he only answers to Optimus Prime himself.
Due to his extreme moodiness and inert rebellious nature, he has been known to directly disobey any orders sent out to him and would sometimes simply not appear when needed.
Nightstalker is also intelligent, wise, opinionated and stubborn when it comes to defending whatever cause he might adopt. He suffers no fools, has been known to occasionally question authority, and is always eager for an intellectual debate. However, he is usually easily convinced by reasonable arguments, and if convinced, will set his focus and mind on performing the job at hand to utmost perfection.
It has been acknowledge that he would actually make a good leader of small squads/teams. However, due mainly to his anti-establishment tendencies, he has no interest whatsoever in taking up such responsibilities and actively shuns any opportunity to be a leader, preferring to take up a more carefree advisory and supportive role in teams.

Nightstalker cares little about the war and who emerges victorious at the end - as long as the victors give him room to do his own thing from time to time, he really has no qualms about helping them (unfortunately, due to Megatron's authoritative style of governance, this has tended to be on the side of the Autobots)
His real aim in life is to drive around the world and take in as many sights as possible, as well as to occasionally cause a little bit of havoc and car accidents from time to time. (being a former Decepticon, Nightstalker does enjoy his fair share of chaos and pranks!)

Nightstalker is a stalker in battle. He rarely charges head on into a confrontation without first weighing the odds, preferring to play an advisory or support role in any major battle. He is calculative, strategic and can be cunning if he wants to.
If the need to be in battle arises, Nightstalker prefers to use hit and run tactics rather than outright confrontation, using his speed to get close to his opponents and slicing them with his twin sabres, before slipping away unnoticed by his quarry.

Nightstalker is light built, and one of the smaller robots, as such, what he has in terms of speed and agility is matched by an utter lack in brute strength. This is a key weakness that he himself acknowledges, and thus, covers by never staying in a battle for too long a time lest his lack of stamina and strength start to show.
However, if he is ever restrained by stronger robots, Nightstalker has his means of breaking free by utilizing missile launchers on his shoulders, or his powerful slow load Energon Cannon that morphs out of his right arm.
But other than that, Nightstalkers greatest weapons are his own skill at keeping himself own of his enemies clutches, skirting in and out of danger, and striking them in the chaos that ensures.

Special attacks:
Chaos strike - Nightstalker transforms into his alternate form, speeds into the heart of battle, transforms into Robot form, and slashes anything in his path (the unfortunate side effect of this is that he tends to, in his bloodlust and frenzy, strike allies as well.)

Chaos irritant - Nightstalker starts skirting around the enemy at top speed, distracting him while continuous talking and bombarding him with irritating questions, missles and bullets. The purpose is to disorientate the enemy while someone else takes aim and knocks the enemy out with a single devastating blow.

Chaos theory - Nightstalker slams into the enemy, latches on, and attempts to take his enemy out with a single blow from his powerful slow load Energon cannon. (This move is not performed regularly as it usually entails that Nightstalker has to risk his neck to do so, which is something that he is not particularly keen to take up.)

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posted by voldemort33 @ 12:14   0 comments
Thursday, 21 June 2007
shrek the third and mango sale
I met up with Lileng today to watch Shrek the Third at GV Marina.
Suan was supposed to meet us but because she was so busy with preparations for her overseas CIP trip, she didn't reach until around 1500 hr. So it was just the two of us for the movie.

Anyway Shrek the Third wasn't as bad as many reviews put it to be. I thought it was very funny - its been ages since I laughed that much. I think its because there were lots of in-jokes and adult humour in it, or at least more so compared to the previous two installments of the Shrek series, so much so it that its jokes weren't very obvious and required some level of thinking before one can understand them.
But it was still pretty intelligent I guess, which is what the Shrek series is well known for. I love the fact that the jokes aren't obvious - means you have to have some level of maturity and intelligence to really get them.
I guess the reason why the reviews about it was so bad was probably due to the fact that there wasn't anything fresh or exciting about it - people are probably used to the kind of humour it had and were expecting something new, something more.
I thought it was quite sad though, that Lileng and I were the only ones laughing so loudly in the theatre; the families of parents with their kids there probably didn't get the jokes or something.

Its been ages since I met up with Lileng and Suan. The last time I met the two of them for our little trio gatherings was way back in December, at the end of CA1.
It was nice to meet up with them, chatting and stuff. So many things have happened in the past 6 months and I guess it was inevitable that they started asking me about relationship stuff.
But it was nice catching up. And, like always, they dragged me along for shopping, asking for my opinions and views concerning female fashion apparels like its part of some personality test or something.

I was particularly freaked out by the Mango Sale. It was madness, like stepping onto some sort of battle ground where blood thirsty girls were out hunting and snatching apparently good buys from each other. It was just... madness. I felt like a fish out of water, and every attempt for me to find a corner where I could remain inconspicuously hidden was wrecked by the fact that every corner seemed to be occupied by some sale crazy female trying to see if some article of clothing would fit them.
I think I was poked by at least 10 different clothes hangers, pushed about by females laden with shopping bags and clothes and stepped on at least 5 times in my short 20 minutes there. It was one hell of an experience.
I don't really understand what the fuss was about the Mango sale. I was asking the girls if the clothes were really good or something, but both gave me replies that indicated that Mango clothes aren't that fantastic or well made - in fact, the only impression I got about Mango is that the clothing chain really slash their prices during sales and thus the clothes on offer become significantly cheaper.
Still I think its not really worth it to brave the crowd so as to get some pieces of clothing when its not exactly dead cheap, but what the heck, its not really my business to point that out to female shoppers.

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posted by voldemort33 @ 23:58   1 comments
Friday, 15 June 2007
jet lagged
5 Signs That You Are Jet Lagged
1. You sleep for 12 hours on the night of your return from Europe, only to wake up at 1400 hr the next day, resulting in you having to consume your flattened Krispy Kreme Donuts for lunch instead of breakfast.

2. You try to sleep at 2300 hr, only to keep tossing and turning in bed over the next 3 hours, before getting up in frustration to use the internet to play catch up with 3 weeks worth of '康熙来了' episodes.

3. You managed to fall asleep at 0400 hr in the morning, only to promptly wake up 3 hours later at 0700 hr, wondering why the sky is now so bright when it was pretty dark just a moment ago.

4. You resort to reading "Harry Potter and the Order of The Phoenix" before bed to try to instill some sense of drowsiness in you, only to find that after reading seven chapters of the book, you are more piqued up by the desire to keep reading the book through the wee hours of the morning than the idea of catching some sleep.

5. You still feel the urge to convert the time on your clocks to European/UK time, before coming to a stark realization that you are back in Singapore and there really isn't any need to subtract 6/7 hours from the time seen on your timepieces.

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posted by voldemort33 @ 09:23   0 comments
Saturday, 19 May 2007
we are going to the zoo zoo zoo!


04s71 went to the zoo today. Or rather 6 members of 04s71 went to the zoo today. It was kinda sad that an outing with an expected turn out of 11 ended up just being an outing of 6. But its so typical of 71. What can we say, we sorta expected it. Haha.
So in the end it was just the 6 of us: Gilyn, Shinwei, Khengwee, Yisheng, Anthony and me.



I love the zoo. Ever since I was a child, the zoo was the one and only place that I loved to visit. It definitely has to do with the fact that I love animals, and in fact, I still do. I'd always said that if I didn't get accepted into Medical School, I most likely would have gone overseas to read veterinary science, and come back to be a vet or something. And working in the zoo, or volunteering there for the matter, has always been somewhat of a dream of mine. And unfortunately, its been a dream I have yet to have fulfilled. So maybe, one day, when everything is right, I will actually get to work or volunteer there. We'll see.



I just have to mention about this particular sheep. He has a serious case of an indirect hernia. I am serious. I was so so traumatized and worried for this sheep that I became quite distraught and obsessed with trying to determine what was wrong with him. You can ask the rest of them. Plus he was a sheep, one of my kind, and it pains me to see one of my kind in such trouble.
Really felt the sheep's pain. I mean, it had horribly horribly stretched testicles, so stretched that it was touching the floor. It was so painful to even watch him walk around the enclosure. I hope the vets treat him or something, and put him out of his misery. Poor dude.



Spot the Kangaroo!



Shinwei asked me to pull the nose of the statue of the Probiscus Monkey and take a photo with it. So here it is. We did a lot of stupid things really.
The girls were debating which animals they liked based on their faces - whether they had evil faces or kind faces - which I think is a very strange way to explain why you like a certain animal.
And we kept pretending we were intellects who knew all about the animals, spurting out random facts about the animals, when the truth is that we were just merely reciting the information on the boards at the enclosures. Once, some of us even started jumping to try to get some goat like creature to jump with us.
Oh and when Gilyn started singing 'When you're happy and you know it, wag your tail!' Shinwei and I actually went 'Wag wag!' And the four of them were quite amazed that 2 medical students could be so childish as to sing along. I think we were both quite amazed too. Haha!



Oh the Baboons are amazing. The Singapore Zoo's Baboon exhibit is a very very fantastic example of how landscaping plays an important part in making the enclosure so much more realistic.
It was amazing to watch the Baboons running around, living lives so startling similar to our own. Its like watching a soap opera. Always a hoot.



This king cobra was apparently attracted to me. It slithered all the way across the enclosure, right to the corner where I stood. And when I moved away, it slithered away. The rest say its because it wants to bite me. I say its because it knows that I'm Lord Voldemort and thus am able to communicate with snakes. So it slithered across the room to pay homage to its great master. Hehe.



Butterfly from the Fragile Forest trying to suck out the juices of Yisheng's hand.



Ben N Jerry's! We treated ourselves to Ben N Jerry's after a day of walking.

I had fun in the zoo today. But then I always have fun in the zoo. Haha. Its an annual sorta thing, go there almost once every year. I think I will never get sick of it, seeing the animals, listening to them, makes me happy. I dunno why. Maybe its telling that I feel so much happier around animals compared to being around humans.

I have so many other photos of other beautiful animals to post. I'm just gonna leave them for my own viewing pleasure.

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posted by voldemort33 @ 23:55   0 comments
Saturday, 12 May 2007
3 days (part4)
10/05/07
Gosh, I hope to complete this entry quickly.

Anyway, continuing where I left off... after SYF, I went for a quick lunch at Lau Pah Sat, where I ate Pig's Brain Soup. I've fallen in love with it ever since Yisheng introduced it to me on a particularly memorable night cycling trip. So had it again that day.

Results where released today. I was going to Holland Village to go to Settlers' with Shinwei, Yuen Mei and Yisheng, and since I had quite some time to spare, decided to go to school to check my results. I passed my first year in med school with a triplet of Bs. Quite happy caused I aimed to get that right from the start of med school. I hope everyone did well, and passed, and did according to your expectations! Think our batch is quite good, cause the list of people who had to take supplementaries was quite short... I think it had less than 10 people. So kudos to us all. Haha.

Met Yisheng at Burger King in Holland Village after that. Waited for Yuen Mei and Shinwei who apparently missed the bus-stop and had to take a cab back down to Holland V. Girls. Haha.
After that, the 4 of us made our way down to Settlers' only to discover that it was FULLY BOOKED, and the 4 of us made the fatal mistake of not reserving a place there. The only available table was at 6, which we weren't up for. So in the end, we decided to just go to some place with food and drinks and most importantly, air condition to just chill.
Went to this bread shop called Provence or something like that. Had a couple of nice cheese buns and a delicious cup of ice chocolate. It was during then that Zhiyong called me with the 'Live' telecast results of SYF. Also listened to alot of different stories about Yuen Mei and her new found love.
I think she's happy, even though erm... they got together quite fast. Anyway, Yisheng and Shinwei both saw the boy, and apparently he looks like a nice, honest guy, so we are quite relieved for her and happy for her to have found a nice companion.
So congratulations Yuen Mei! May you enjoy more blissful days to come! Haha.

We got so bored that Shinwei suddenly suggested going to Haw Par Villa. And the rest of us were so enthusiastic, we immediately decided to make a trip down there.
So the 4 of us got into a cab, and ended up in Haw Par Villa. Can you imagine? What was intended to be a trip to Settlers' ended up as a visit to Haw Par Villa. We are really quite a crazy bunch of people.
But anyway, we had quite a tough time there. It was so hot, and I think all 4 of us were too overly dressed for Haw Par Villa, cause we intended our day to be one spent in the comforts of an air conditioned place.
We even paid a token 1 dollar fee to enter the '10 Courts of Hell' exhibit. I have no idea why tourists are willing to even go there. I mean, its just filled with gruesome (and admittedly, rather unrealistic) plaster statues of people being tortured and more importantly, the place is horribly stuffy and has absolutely no ventilation at all. We were so put off by the heat that by the time we got out of the exhibit, most of our energy and mood had been sapped away.
So we just spent the remaining of our time there, walking around, taking photos. In the end, we just couldn't stand the heat, so we decided to bail. We probably explored less than a quarter of the place. Haha. But hey, entrance to the park itself was free, so we didn't lose much.

Nevertheless, it was quite an interesting trip. Goes to show that interesting outings can happen just out of the spontaneity of the moment.

I'm too lazy to do a good ending. I guess my entry about the 3 days (08 to 10 of May) ends here. Woo hoo!

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posted by voldemort33 @ 22:03   0 comments
Friday, 11 May 2007
3 days (part1)
Oh thank god I'm finally able to post today. I have so much to talk about over the last 3 days!

08/05/07
I woke up at an unearthly 0530 today. Can you imagine? That's 30 minutes before the time I had set on my alarm clock. I was woken up by two messages from Yisheng, one telling me that he'll lend me a set of HC uniforms, and the other, asking if I had anymore HC badges. I briefly replied the messages, but couldn't get back to sleep, so I decided to just go shower and prepare for my day.

As you would have probably guessed, I went back to HCJC on monday. Accompanying me on my mad trip back was Yisheng, Eesuan and Shinwei. Four crazy, and all-too-free lunatics who wanted to go back to their old school, dressed in school uniforms and all. It was hilarious really. We all looked pretty much the same as our JC selves, but I guess anyone will turn out that way if you don the HC uniform. Hurhur.
Kept trying to avoid being caught by some of my juniors in the HC uniform. Can you imagine? Getting caught in the HC uniform by juniors that you know, who are like 2 years younger than you? My reputation would be gone in like an instance. (unfortunately, a couple of them did see me in my HC uniform, and I had to meet them two days later at SYF. Sigh.)

The reason why we decided to meet so early (at around 0710) was because we wanted to crash the morning assembly. We were already running a bit late because I had to change into the uniform, and the girls were slightly late, so we had to rush to get into line before the bell rang.
We were literally the last few 'students' in the right wing, and we just charged into the central plaza, not knowing where we were supposed to stand because we obviously didn't have a class to stand with.
Suan just led the way, and we ended up behind some random class. The funny thing was that we were so out-of-touch with the once familar routine of morning assemblies that we turned at the wrong commands and forgot that we had to do stuff like say the pledge and all. And when the teachers started going down the row to take attendance, we were quite freaked out that the teacher of the class we joined would ask for an explanation of our presence there. Yisheng even planned a story about us being foreign exchange students to explain our sudden existence. Haha.
So we stood out like sore thumbs! Especially Shinwei with her red hair! HAHA. During the course of the morning announcements, swarms of teachers just kept descending on her asking her to explain why she had reddish hair. Some of them recognised her, being her council teachers and stuff, but it was still quite embarrassing trying to explain our existence there, and why we were in uniforms and all. One particularly anal teacher wanted Shinwei to change out of the uniform, because of her hair. Being young adults, we naturally didn't heed his words (and were quite lucky that we didn't encounter him again.)

Anyway, we wanted to crash some lectures, but found out from Yisheng's cousin who happens to be in 07s71 (our great grand junior class) that they didn't have much lectures today, except Economics. Haha. We didn't want to crash an Econs lecture, so we decided to just chill in the canteen first before we set out to find our tutors. And we ended up meeting our Maths tutor there! Chatted with him for awhile, then went to find the rest of our tutors in the staff room.
Met Mrs Chong, our Economics Tutor, and had a rather hilarious conversation with her. She starting making a list of our class, but she kept spelling our names wrongly - 'Damian' as 'Daiman', 'Yuen Mei' as 'Yuen Mein'- the hilarious thing was the four of us sorta gave up correcting her - we felt that there was no point really. Haha.
Then we met Mr Lee, our Chemistry tutor, and dragged him to the consultation area, where we had a lengthy conversation with him. It was very fun to catch up with him, because I was quite close to him and he is the youngest (and most childish) of our tutors, so the class sorta connected with him.
And then our CT and GP tutor Mr Wong came after spotting Yisheng when he went to fill his water bottle! Haha! Then Mr Lee changed shift with him and Mr Wong then came to talk to us at the consultation area for a very very long time, til he had to take off for another lesson. Mr Wong's another tutor that I'm close with, and he just kept rambling on and on about people in class and stuff. Since he was sorta like our 'father' and all (Mr Lee kept telling Mr Wong that we were his "children"), it was really fun to hear him ramble on about our class again.

After that we invited Mr Lee, who was darn free for that day, to go to have lunch we us. We wanted to eat at our favourite eatery, Curry Wok, but they were actually closed on Tuesdays! ARGH!
So we ended up eating at Prince in Coronation Plaza instead. Geraldine joined us for lunch as well, so we had a rather hilarious time there where we inadvertently helped Mr Lee order an adult set meal without knowing the price of it, while we helped ourselves to the ridiculously cheap student meals. Haha.

We were quite silly as we forgot to take photos with the teachers. And the ironic thing was that all 4 of us had cameras. I guess you just forget stuff when you are having fun. Haha.

We decided that we are gonna do this again sometime, to go play volleyball at the courts. Its our class tradition to play volleyball - though for my case, its always either to watch the rest play or go down onto the courts to provide comic relief. Can't wait though! Haha.

*I do have photos to post but blogger's taking abit too long to publish them, so I'll leave them for another time.

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posted by voldemort33 @ 23:29   0 comments
Thursday, 12 April 2007
haunted school
You know what I'm missing right now?

I'm missing the stories of the floating head of Lee Kong Chian, which would chase down track and field boys having their solo nights near the Kong Chian house.
I'm missing the stories of the spirit of Tan Kah Kee going on tour during certain night, and how if you encounter an old man asking, in Hokkien, for the time near midnight, never look at him in the face or you'll get possessed by his spirit.
I'm missing the whole conspiracy theory of how the school's designed to be in a structure of a dragon to destroy other's feng shui, or that it looks like a tomb to house the spirit of Tan Kah Kee.
I'm missing the stories of the green baby who haunts the science labs, how he was born premature to some lab technical and how they preserved his body, and how he still floats around the place from the time to time.

I'm missing the whole Kempeitai headquarters in the clock tower thing, how they used to hang the heads of rebels on the trees around it, how the spirit of Japanese soldiers who fell to their deaths there still haunt the place.
I'm missing the stories of the bridge that always collapses, and how the water turned red, and how they had to place statues of pagodas and mutilated monsters in the river to pacify the unhappy spirits.
I'm missing the stories of how the huge tree planted on some supposed well like structure was to keep the dead bodies beneath in, and how that, if you removed the tree, blood would come spurting out of the well.

I'm missing the two sago trees planted just in front of the clock tower, which were supposedly used to guide the unhappy spirits home.
I'm missing the stories of some PE teacher taking a jog around the track in the morning and seeing decapitated heads hanging from the trees and flag posts.
I'm missing the times where I dared myself to walk up to the final floor of the clock tower alone, only to freak out when I hear creaking and strange noises near the top.

What I'm really missing, is studying in a supposedly haunted school.
And you know what? It took a night time stroll, through the very same campus to make me realise how much I missed it.

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posted by voldemort33 @ 13:03   0 comments
Monday, 2 April 2007
i want to commit bird murder
UPDATE @ 2244: DAMN IT! THE STUPID BIRD IS SCREECHING RIGHT NOW. ARRGGGHHHH!

One of my neighbours owns a pet cockatoo.
Wow. A pet cockatoo! You know, those white birds with yellow combs, hooked beaks and a rather nasal sounding voice/call/screech/whatever.

I am an animal lover. Okay, I love all animals, big and small, except maybe mosquitoes and sharks, but yesh, the point is, I love animals.
So normally, I would be quite pleased if my neighbour owes a cockatoo. It'll add some cheer to the surroundings.
Unfortunately, I am not in that happy place right now. I am a medical student who has to do some bit of revision everyday, and medical students that are facing an impending exam don't do well with noise. Let alone noises from a screeching bird. A freaking, screeching bird.

I wouldn't mind if the bird chooses to do its screeching the bright morning of day. I mean, I think it'll be quite charming if it did; its like its telling the world it loves the light of day. Okay, I'm fine with that.
But NOOooooooOOOoooo! The stupid feather brained cockatoo just loves to do its screeching when the sun is long down and the moon is long out. When half the world is asleep, when I am either trying to finish reading my last paragraph or last page of a certain chapter in a textbook, or a certain set of notes.
It chooses to keep up its periodic screeches when I am lying on my bed, tossing and turning, trying to get to sleep. The freaking bird just doesn't know when to shut up!

Which is why I am seriously contemplating my options of committing bird murder and not getting caught in the process of doing so.
Unfortunately, its quite hard to do so because:
1. I do not know which exact household owns the stupid bird.
2. I think it'll be quite hard to catch a stupid cockatoo, especially if it starts flying.
3. I don't really know what kind of metabolic poison to give to a bird: is it the same for humans and animals? Can I give it like cyanide or 2,4 DNP or cyclohexamide or something?
4. How do I even get access to the bird in the first place? It'll be too conspicuous for me to just turn up and knock on someone's door and ask to see their resident noisemaking bird.
5. My mom actually loves the damn bird. She finds its calls 'charming'. Pppppfffttttt!

So I decided that I can't really kill the bird with my own hands... so I've been trying to bride the cat of my other neighbour to kill the bird.
She's (I think its a she) this really fat, proud, white cat with loads of fur. She's been using my garden as an expressway for getting around the estate, and we've been nice enough to allow her to use it free all this time without having to pay for its usage.
So I thought its high time that she pays her due - by helping me to kill the damn bird. But being a stuck up cat that she is, she has refused to listened to me or take the little bits of snacks that I've been offering. Pompous prissy pig.
Maybe I should consider committing cat murder as well.

See all this wouldn't be a problem if I had a dog.
I'll just send my dog to go puncture the cat's esophagus or something, and send my dog to decapitate the stupid cockatoo. And the thing is dogs are loyal creatures and they'll gladly take the rat for it. Wee-hee!
(and you guys wonder why I want a dog. Muahahaha.)

Please don't report me to the SPCA. I really do love animals. (Most of the time anyway.)

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posted by voldemort33 @ 20:17  
yours truly

Name: voldemort33
XY, 01/06/1987, s'porean
typical geminian
free-thinker
moody & eccentric
thinks far too much for his own good
med student (be afraid. be very afraid!)
demon45_6f@hotmail.com
crazy craves
music (jazz, rock and lounge)
day-dreaming
drawing & photography
animals (sheep!)
chocolate and tea!
seafood, noodles and soup!
pet peeves
noisy crowds
over-possessive, insecure, whiny people
two-faced hypocrites
housework and homework
being called 'rich'
rushing to do stuff
crying, pesky kids
deepest darkest desires! (aka wishlist!)
to be a doctor (with a heart of gold!)
a dog
my own condo apartment
a driving license and my own four wheel drive
my own comic line
someone to hug
present
past
musings and inklings
people
other worlds
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